Overheard on Campus

Girl: You look bedraggled today, in all the best ways of course

Guy: (emergency notification system goes off) It’s the Russians!

Professor: I’m probably going to let you out of class early

Student: Is this some cruel joke?

Student: It’ll be like four minutes early

Professor: This is what happens when your professor is totally sleep deprived

Girl 1: They tried to take our innocence

Girl 2: Your definition of innocence is a bit relative

Professor: The prince always turns out so wimpy after transforming back from the beast; it’s always so disappointing

Girl: You just circumcised your banana

Professor: If you can go up to JMU to get drunk, you can go to JMU to get books

Girl #1: I look like my mother!

Girl #2: At least you know you’ll be hot

Girl: He looks so hot for 82!

Girl: Don’t pancake my boobs, they might not pop out again

Professor: Don’t let the library win

Professor: Have I inspired the troops?

Student: Always

Professor: Huzzah!

Girl 1: Where are your pants?

Girl 2: I don’t have any

Professor: Robots are coming for us

Guy: I’m going to make someone happy one day just not you

Guy: I’m sure most of the girls in this (gender studies) class want to be housewives

Girl: You think I’m paying this much money to be a housewife, I’m no FCS major!

Girl #1: What type of music is this?

Girl #2: Alternative

Girl #1: How about alternat-off

Professor: Your generation has real trouble with watching movies from before 1990

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